The Mississippi-Iowa Connection

Tomorrow at this time I'll be in Mississippi. I'm really looking forward to the trip. My parish is sponsoring a house in Biloxi through Habitat for Humanity. I'll be wearing an Iowa t-shirt every day...even if we lose to Ohio State...which is a real possibility. Hey, hey, hey! I'm just being realistic. It doesn't mean I don't have faith in the team - that's not the case at all. In Drew We Trust...The Great Drewdini...I believe.

I remember October 19, 1985. #1 Iowa vs. #2 Michigan...Iowa wins 12-10 in a last second kick by Rob Houghtlin. Even though I was only 13 at the time, I remember it vividly. So I'm a little off topic. Cut me some slack - I love my Hawkeyes.

So on to Mississippi. I'll be out of pocket for a while, so no mullings or observations until the 5th.

(Go Hawks)

Do you forget people jumping off the 80th floor?

I'm always a day late and a dollar short, but I still seem to beat the major cable networks (except Fox News) in "reporting" on significant stories concerning the war on Islamofascism. On Tuesday, Jennifer Loven, that bastion of journalistic integrity and neutrality from the Associated Press, asked Afghanistan's President Karzai this question (cock it and pull it, Jennifer):

"Thank you, sir. Even after hearing that one of the major conclusions of the National Intelligence Estimate in April was that the Iraq war has fueled terror growth around the world, why have you continued to say that the Iraq war has made this country safer?"

The story is not her question, but President Karzai's eloquent response. Follow the link to http://hotair.com/archives/2006/09/26/must-see-video-karzai-responds-to-reporters-question-about-terrorism/ and watch. His answer is at the end of the clip, but the entire clip is excellent. Ahhhhh, eloquence and sense. God keep him safe. A man of reason and sense in a region of irrationality and chaos.

Before I leave to watch it again, I have to send this question out into the void, "Why did I have to read about this in an obscure blog?"

Classic

My friend's colleague ran into Clinton Kelly from TLC's "What Not To Wear" in an Adams' Morgan bar this week. Apparently she was pretty tipsy and was really chatting him up. But her friend had a little bit more to drink and in a burst of excitment walked up to him and asked, "How do I look?" For the non-style mavens out there, that's the name of a different style show on a different network. Classic.

More Material From Heather

Once again, great material passed along from Heather. Quote of the Day from the Wall Street Journal's Political Diary - and it's from the Washington Post. Who knew?

"[N]othing the pope has ever said comes even close to matching the vitriol, extremism and hatred that pour out of the mouths of radical imams and fanatical clerics every day, all across Europe and the Muslim world, almost none of which ever provokes any Western response at all. And maybe it's time that it should... [I]f stray comments by Western leaders -- not to mention Western films, books, cartoons, traditions and values -- are going to inspire regular violence, I don't feel that it's asking too much for the West to quit saying sorry and unite, occasionally, in its own defense. The fanatics attacking the pope already limit the right to free speech among their own followers. I don't see why we should allow them to limit our right to free speech, too" -- Washington Post columnist Anne Applebaum.

A Religion of Peace

The irrational Muslim fanatics across the globe are STILL rioting about Pope Benedict XVI quoting a 14th century Turkish emperor who made what the modern day PC police would consider "insensitive remarks" about Islam. But now they're saying he should DIE. Die? Yes, die. They're burning his image in the streets in Pakistan, they're reconsidering allowing him to visit Turkey next month. Hmmm. What was that quote again? Let's revisit:

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached.”’

If their threatening response wasn't so real and filled with sincere vitriol, it would be absolutely hysterical. No! No! Islam isn't a violent religion. What ever would give one that idea? It's clearly a religion of peace.

A sampling of articles from various media outlets highlights the gravity of the situation:

CAIRO, Egypt - Al-Qaida in Iraq warned Pope Benedict XVI on Monday that its war against Christianity and the West will go on until Islam takes over the world, and Iran’s supreme leader called for more protests over the pontiff’s remarks on Islam. Protests broke out in South Asia and Indonesia, with angry Muslims saying Benedict’s statement of regret a day earlier did not go far enough. In southern Iraq, demonstrators carrying black flags burned an effigy of the pope.

London,UK - A notorious Muslim extremist told a demonstration in London yesterday that the Pope should face execution.

Anjem Choudary said those who insulted Islam would be "subject to capital punishment".
His remarks came during a protest outside Westminster Cathedral on a day that worldwide anger among Muslim hardliners towards Pope Benedict XVI appeared to deepen.


The section highlighted in bold represents the first time I've seen the current war characterized by Muslim fanatics as a "war against Christianity." Does that now give us license to call this war what it really is and put the politically correct language on the burn pile? It is not a war on terror. Terrorism is a tactic used in the war. We're in a war against Muslim fanatics - or Islamofascists as the President said a few weeks ago (and as talk radio has been saying for more than a year.) Like Billy Joel says, "We didn't start the fire."

http://www.evilconservativeblog.com/

The Pope, Gremlins, Forests and Iran

I was going to write about the whiners in the Muslim world who take offense at the Pope quoting a 14th century Byzantine emperor. “The emperor comes to speak about the issue of jihad, holy war,” the pope said. “He said, I quote, ’Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached.”’

I was going to write about how some whack job Turkish leader is now comparing our Pope to Hitler and Mussolini. “Benedict, the author of such unfortunate and insolent remarks, is going down in history for his words,” he said. “He is going down in history in the same category as leaders such as (Adolf) Hitler and (Benito) Mussolini.” But I'm tired of people clamoring for apologies from this leader and that leader for saying this wrong thing and that wrong thing. This kind of rhetoric, and its perpetuation and distortion in the Muslim and western media, ignites the jihadists and as my friend Kristin would say, "makes them multiply like water on gremlins."

But I'm not going to write about that. Thanks to Heather for bringing another brilliant Charles Krauthammer column to my attention. It is, as Heather pointed out, sobering. We are living, as the president has said but not enough people take seriously, at a defining moment in the history of not only our country, but of the world. Set aside politics and ideology for just a moment. Accept it in the spirit in which it is offered - not to fearmonger but as preparation for what is to come. The scourge of radical Islam threatens to destroy all of civilization, let alone western civilization. I think what worries me more - what really keeps me up at night - is the fear that we are destroying ourselves. United we stand. Divided we fall. See the trees? Look again. It's a forest.

www. realclearpolitics.com
September 15, 2006
The Tehran Calculus
By Charles Krauthammer

WASHINGTON -- In his televised 9/11 address, President Bush said that we must not "leave our children to face a Middle East overrun by terrorist states and radical dictators armed with nuclear weapons.'' There's only one such current candidate: Iran.

The next day, he responded thus (as reported by Rich Lowry and Kate O'Beirne of National Review) to a question on Iran: "It's very important for the American people to see the president try to solve problems diplomatically before resorting to military force.''

"Before'' implies that the one follows the other. The signal is unmistakable. An aerial attack on Iran's nuclear facilities lies just beyond the horizon of diplomacy. With the crisis advancing and the moment of truth approaching, it is important to begin looking now with unflinching honesty at the military option.

The costs will be terrible:

Economic. An attack on Iran will likely send oil prices overnight to $100 or even to $150. That will cause a worldwide recession perhaps as deep as the one triggered by the Iranian revolution of 1979.

Iran might suspend its own 2.5 million barrels a day of oil exports, and might even be joined by Venezuela's Hugo Chavez, asserting primacy as the world's leading anti-imperialist. But even more effectively, Iran will shock the oil markets by closing the Strait of Hormuz through which 40 percent of the world's exports flow every day.

Iran could do this by attacking ships in the Strait, scuttling its own ships, laying mines or just threatening to launch Silkworm anti-ship missiles at any passing tanker.

The U.S. Navy will be forced to break the blockade. We will succeed but at considerable cost. And it will take time -- during which time the world economy will be in a deep spiral.

Military. Iran will activate its proxies in Iraq, most notably, Moqtada al-Sadr's Mahdi Army. Sadr is already wreaking havoc with sectarian attacks on Sunni civilians. Iran could order the Mahdi Army and its other agents within the police and armed forces to take up arms against the institutions of the central government itself, threatening the very anchor of the new Iraq. Many Mahdi will die, but they live to die. Many Iraqis and coalition soldiers are likely to die as well.

Among the lesser military dangers, Iran might activate terrorist cells around the world, although without nuclear capability that threat is hardly strategic. It will also be very difficult to unleash its proxy Hezbollah, now chastened by the destruction it brought upon Lebanon in the latest round with Israel and deterred by the presence of Europeans in the south Lebanon buffer zone.

Diplomatic. There will be massive criticism of America from around the world. Much of it is to be discounted. The Muslim street will come out again for a few days, having replenished its supply of flammable American flags most recently exhausted during the cartoon riots. Their governments will express solidarity with a fellow Muslim state, but this will be entirely hypocritical. The Arabs are terrified about the rise of a nuclear Iran and would privately rejoice in its defanging.

The Europeans will be less hypocritical because their visceral anti-Americanism trumps rational calculation. We will have done them an enormous favor by sparing them the threat of Iranian nukes, but they will vilify us nonetheless.

These are the costs. There is no denying them. However, equally undeniable is the cost of doing nothing.

In the region, Persian Iran will immediately become the hegemonic power in the Arab Middle East. Today it is deterred from overt aggression against its neighbors by the threat of conventional retaliation. Against a nuclear Iran, such deterrence becomes far less credible. As its weak, non-nuclear Persian Gulf neighbors accommodate to it, jihadist Iran will gain control of the most strategic region on the globe.

Then there is the larger danger of permitting nuclear weapons to be acquired by religious fanatics seized with an eschatological belief in the imminent apocalypse and in their own divine duty to hasten the End of Days. The mullahs are infinitely more likely to use these weapons than anyone in the history of the nuclear age. Every city in the civilized world will live under the specter of instant annihilation delivered either by missile or by terrorist. This from a country that has an official Death to America Day and has declared since Ayatollah Khomeini's ascension that Israel must be wiped off the map.

Against millenarian fanaticism glorying in a cult of death, deterrence is a mere wish. Is the West prepared to wager its cities with their millions of inhabitants on that feeble gamble?

These are the questions. These are the calculations. The decision is no more than a year away.

Commuting Humor

Every day on my way to work I sit at a stoplight at the intersection of North Capitol and K Street NW. It's a busy intersection with a lot of eccelctic pedestrian traffic. Today a man strolled past my car eating a bag of microwave popcorn.

About two months ago I was stuck in the 3rd St. tunnel behind a sewage truck. I couldn't help but think if a terrorist blew up the tunnel while I was sitting there, I wouldn't just die. I'd die covered in crap. Then I noticed the slogan on the back of the truck. "We're Number 1 in a Number 2 Business."

I'm sure there will be more. At least I hope so. When it takes at least 45 minutes to travel 9.8 miles, humor is a necessity.

Go Stuff Yourself

I remember nearly every moment of that day. What’s so strange is how clearly I remember leaving my house for work. I remember opening the door and walking out to the stoop. I stopped and took a deep breath, looked up to the sky and smiled. Fall had arrived. The sky was the bluest I’d ever seen. It’s something that everyone who remembers that day says, “The sky was so blue.” But it really was remarkable, like no other blue I’d ever seen – or have seen since. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Summer’s humidity was finally gone and the air was crisp and clean. I even remember the lilt in my step as I walked to the car. It was one of those days that make you stop and consider, just for a second, playing hookey from work.

There’s no need to go into the details of my experience in the intervening hours between when I left for work that morning and finally found a few hours of sleep in the early morning hours of the next day. Five years to the day later, I’m incredulous how quickly people forget. I’m still angry. I haven’t forgiven. “Father forgive them, they know not what they do.” Shouldn’t that be the example I should follow? The problem is that they knew exactly what they were doing.

Today I read an article in the Washington Post about a Michigan mother’s quest to speak to the mother of the terrorist who murdered her son on September 11. (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/09/10/AR2006091001186.html). It’s a fascinating account of her efforts and I was captivated. And then I read it – it was inevitable. She put together a PowerPoint presentation on what the White House knew before Sept. 11. “Information," she concludes, "was there." She slapped an anti-Bush bumper sticker on her car. Later in the article she concludes “her own nation is not blameless.” The criticisms some Muslims have of American society are well-founded, she argues, "the conspicuous consumption, trash TV, too much drinking and drugs."

So these American transgressions against the world justify murdering nearly 3000 civilians in cold blood? Trash TV too much for you? Turn it off. Too much drinking? Have ya' been to Ireland? Drugs – can you say poppies in Afghanistan? Cocaine in Columbia? My sympathy for this woman is gone. My rage, anger and disgust with the “Blame America First” crowd nears that for the Islamist terrorists who perpetrate the crimes against all of humanity. Don’t like America? Get in your Volvo and drive north...or south. It's a free country.

So to commemorate this day, I observed a moment of silence at 8:46 a.m. on my way to work. At the same time, a jet flew low overhead out of Reagan National Airport above the 14th Street bridge. I indulged in a decadent meal of linguini in vodka sauce, drank too much wine and ate too much ice cream. I watched some trash TV. God bless America.

The following is the transcript from the President 9/11 5th anniversary address to the nation. I can't believe this is the world we live in.

A text of President Bush's address Monday evening, as provided by the White House:
Bush: Good evening. Five years ago, this date _ September the 11th _ was seared into America/s memory. Nineteen men attacked us with a barbarity unequaled in our history. They murdered people of all colors, creeds, and nationalities _ and made war upon the entire free world. Since that day, America and her allies have taken the offensive in a war unlike any we have fought before. Today, we are safer, but we are not yet safe. On this solemn night, I have asked for some of your time to discuss the nature of the threat still before us, what we are doing to protect our nation ... and the building of a more hopeful Middle East that holds the key to peace for America and the world.

On 9/11, our nation saw the face of evil. Yet on that awful day, we also witnessed something distinctly American: ordinary citizens rising to the occasion, and responding with extraordinary acts of courage. We saw courage in office workers who were trapped on the high floors of burning skyscrapers _ and called home so that their last words to their families would be of comfort and love. We saw courage in passengers aboard Flight 93, who recited the 23rd Psalm _ and then charged the cockpit. And we saw courage in the Pentagon staff who made it out of the flames and smoke _ and ran back in to answer cries for help. On this day, we remember the innocent who lost their lives _ and we pay tribute to those who gave their lives so that others might live.

For many of our citizens, the wounds of that morning are still fresh. I have met firefighters and police officers who choke up at the memory of fallen comrades. I have stood with families gathered on a grassy field in Pennsylvania, who take bittersweet pride in loved ones who refused to be victims _ and gave America our first victory in the war on terror. And I have sat beside young mothers with children who are now five-years-old _ and still long for the daddies who will never cradle them in their arms. Out of this suffering, we resolve to honor every man and woman lost. And we seek their lasting memorial in a safer and more hopeful world.

Since the horror of 9/11, we have learned a great deal about the enemy. We have learned that they are evil and kill without mercy _ but not without purpose. We have learned that they form a global network of extremists who are driven by a perverted vision of Islam _ a totalitarian ideology that hates freedom, rejects tolerance and despises all dissent. And we have learned that their goal is to build a radical Islamic empire where women are prisoners in their homes, men are beaten for missing prayer meetings, and terrorists have a safe haven to plan and launch attacks on America and other civilized nations. The war against this enemy is more than a military conflict. It is the decisive ideological struggle of the 21st century, and the calling of our generation.

Our nation is being tested in a way that we have not been since the start of the Cold War. We saw what a handful of our enemies can do with box-cutters and plane tickets. We hear their threats to launch even more terrible attacks on our people. And we know that if they were able to get their hands on weapons of mass destruction, they would use them against us. We face an enemy determined to bring death and suffering into our homes. America did not ask for this war, and every American wishes it were over. So do I. But the war is not over _ and it will not be over until either we or the extremists emerge victorious. If we do not defeat these enemies now, we will leave our children to face a Middle East overrun by terrorist states and radical dictators armed with nuclear weapons. We are in a war that will set the course for this new century _ and determine the destiny of millions across the world.
For America, 9/11 was more than a tragedy _ it changed the way we look at the world. On September the 11th, we resolved that we would go on the offense against our enemies _ and we would not distinguish between the terrorists and those who harbor or support them. So we helped drive the Taliban from power in Afghanistan. We put al-Qaida on the run, and killed or captured most of those who planned the 9/11 attacks _ including the man believed to be the mastermind, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed. He and other suspected terrorists have been questioned by the Central Intelligence Agency _ and they have provided valuable information that has helped stop attacks in America and across the world. Now these men have been transferred to Guantanamo Bay, so they can be held to account for their actions. Osama bin Laden and other terrorists are still in hiding. Our message to them is clear: No matter how long it takes, America will find you, and we will bring you to justice.

On September the 11th, we learned that America must confront threats before they reach our shores _ whether those threats come from terrorist networks or terrorist states. I am often asked why we are in Iraq when Saddam Hussein was not responsible for the 9/11 attacks. The answer is that the regime of Saddam Hussein was a clear threat. My administration, the Congress and the United Nations saw the threat _ and after 9/11, Saddam's regime posed a risk that the world could not afford to take. The world is safer because Saddam Hussein is no longer in power. And now the challenge is to help the Iraqi people build a democracy that fulfills the dreams of the nearly 12 million Iraqis who came out to vote in free elections last December.

Al-Qaida and other extremists from across the world have come to Iraq to stop the rise of a free society in the heart of the Middle East. They have joined the remnants of Saddam's regime and other armed groups to foment sectarian violence and drive us out. Our enemies in Iraq are tough and they are committed _ but so are Iraqi and coalition forces. We are adapting to stay ahead of the enemy _ and we are carrying out a clear plan to ensure that a democratic Iraq succeeds.

We are training Iraqi troops so they can defend their nation. We are helping Iraq's unity government grow in strength and serve its people. We will not leave until this work is done. Whatever mistakes have been made in Iraq, the worst mistake would be to think that if we pulled out, the terrorists would leave us alone. They will not leave us alone. They will follow us. The safety of America depends on the outcome of the battle in the streets of Baghdad. Osama bin Laden calls this fight "the third world war" _ and he says that victory for the terrorists in Iraq will mean America's "defeat and disgrace forever."

If we yield Iraq to men like Bin Laden, our enemies will be emboldened ... they will gain a new safe haven ... and they will use Iraq's resources to fuel their extremist movement. We will not allow this to happen. America will stay in the fight. Iraq will be a free nation, and a strong ally in the war on terror.

We can be confident that our coalition will succeed _ because the Iraqi people have been steadfast in the face of unspeakable violence. And we can be confident in victory _ because of the skill and resolve of America's armed forces. Every one of our troops is a volunteer, and since the attacks of September the 11th, more than 1.6 million Americans have stepped forward to put on our nation's uniform. In Iraq, Afghanistan and other fronts in the war on terror, the men and women of our military are making great sacrifices to keep us safe. Some have suffered terrible injuries _ and nearly 3,000 have given their lives. America cherishes their memory. We pray for their families. And we will never back down from the work they have begun.

We also honor those who toil day and night to keep our homeland safe _ and we are giving them the tools they need to protect our people. We have created the Department of Homeland Security. We have torn down the wall that kept law enforcement and intelligence from sharing information ... we have tightened security at our airports, seaports, and borders ... and we have created new programs to monitor enemy bank records and phone calls. Thanks to the hard work of our law enforcement and intelligence professionals, we have broken up terrorist cells in our midst and saved American lives.

Five years after 9/11, our enemies have not succeeded in launching another attack on our soil _ but they have not been idle. Al-Qaida and those inspired by its hateful ideology have carried out terrorist attacks in more than two dozen nations. And just last month, they were foiled in a plot to blow up passenger planes headed for the United States. They remain determined to attack America and kill our citizens _ and we are determined to stop them. We will continue to give the men and women who protect us every resource and legal authority they need to do their jobs.

In the first days after the 9/11 attacks, I promised to use every element of national power to fight the terrorists wherever we find them. One of the strongest weapons in our arsenal is the power of freedom. The terrorists fear freedom as much as they do our firepower. They are thrown into panic at the sight of an old man pulling the election lever, of girls enrolling in school or families worshipping God in their own traditions. They know that given a choice, people will choose freedom over their extremist ideology. So their answer is to deny people this choice by raging against the forces of freedom and moderation. This struggle has been called a clash of civilizations. In truth, it is a struggle for civilization. We are fighting to maintain the way of life enjoyed by free nations. And we are fighting for the possibility that good and decent people across the Middle East can raise up societies based on freedom, and tolerance, and personal dignity.

We are now in the early hours of this struggle between tyranny and freedom. Amid the violence, some question whether the people of the Middle East want their freedom _ and whether the forces of moderation can prevail. For 60 years, these doubts guided our policies in the Middle East. And then, on a bright September morning, it became clear that the calm we saw in the Middle East was only a mirage. Years of pursuing stability to promote peace had left us with neither. So we changed our policies, and committed America's influence in the world to advancing freedom and democracy as the great alternatives to repression and radicalism.

With our help, the people of the Middle East are now stepping forward to claim their freedom. From Kabul to Baghdad to Beirut, there are brave men and women risking their lives each day for the same freedoms that we enjoy. And they have one question for us: Do we have the confidence to do in the Middle East what our fathers and grandfathers accomplished in Europe and Asia? By standing with democratic leaders and reformers, by giving voice to the hopes of decent men and women, we are offering a path away from radicalism. And we are enlisting the most powerful force for peace and moderation in the Middle East: the desire of millions to be free.

Across the broader Middle East, the extremists are fighting to prevent such a future. Yet America has confronted evil before, and we have defeated it _ sometimes at the cost of thousands of good men in a single battle. When Franklin Roosevelt vowed to defeat two enemies across two oceans, he could not have foreseen D-Day and Iwo Jima _ but he would not have been surprised at the outcome. When Harry Truman promised American support for free peoples resisting Soviet aggression, he could not have foreseen the rise of the Berlin Wall _ but he would not have been surprised to see it brought down. Throughout our history, America has seen liberty challenged _ and every time, we have seen liberty triumph with sacrifice and determination.

At the start of this young century, America looks to the day when the people of the Middle East leave the desert of despotism for the fertile gardens of liberty _ and resume their rightful place in a world of peace and prosperity. We look to the day when the nations of that region recognize that their greatest resource is not the oil in the ground _ but the talent and creativity of their people. We look to the day when moms and dads throughout the Middle East see a future of hope and opportunity for their children. And when that good day comes, the clouds of war will part the appeal of radicalism will decline ... and we will leave our children with a better and safer world. On this solemn anniversary, we rededicate ourselves to this cause. Our nation has endured trials _ and we face a difficult road ahead. Winning this war will require the determined efforts of a unified country. And we must put aside our differences, and work together to meet the test that history has given us. We will defeat our enemies we will protect our people ... and we will lead the 21st century into a shining age of human liberty.

Earlier this year, I traveled to the United States Military Academy. I was there to deliver the commencement address to the first class to arrive at West Point after the attacks of September the 11th. That day I met a proud mom named RoseEllen Dowdell. She was there to watch her son Patrick accept his commission in the finest Army the world has ever known. A few weeks earlier, RoseEllen had watched her other son, James, graduate from the Fire Academy in New York City. On both these days, her thoughts turned to someone who was not there to share the moment: her husband, Kevin Dowdell. Kevin was one of the 343 firefighters who rushed to the burning towers of the World Trade Center on September the 11th _ and never came home. His sons lost their father that day _ but not the passion for service he instilled in them. Here is what RoseEllen says about her boys, "As a mother, I cross my fingers and pray all the time for their safety _ but as worried as I am, I am also proud _ and I know their dad would be too."

Our nation is blessed to have young Americans like these _ and we will need them. Dangerous enemies have declared their intention to destroy our way of life. They are not the first to try _ and their fate will be the same as those who tried before _ 9/11 showed us why. The attacks were meant to bring us to our knees, and they did _ but not in the way the terrorists intended. Americans united in prayer ... came to the aid of neighbors in need ... and resolved that our enemies would not have the last word. The spirit of our people is the source of America's strength. And we go forward with trust in that spirit, confidence in our purpose _ and faith in a loving God who made us to be free.

Thank you, and may God bless you.

Boobs

I had my first bra fitting today. I'm 34. It was easily the single most humiliating experience of my life. A young, waifish French woman - approximately a size 0 with probably an A cup - measured me. She took one look at me and headed to the big girl section of the store. I don't want to talk about it beyond that, so I'd like to conclude with this one statement: Women who get breast implants are deranged.

More Top News

ABC's upcoming miniseries "The Path to 9/11" is generating a firestorm among members of the Clinton administration, who claim the two-part, made-for-TV film is filled with factual errors and lies.

Observation: Hmmm. Hmmmm. Farenheit 9-11.

MILWAUKEE - An 11-year-old girl was sexually assaulted by as many as 20 boys as a 16-year-old girl watched and told her what sex acts to perform, authorities say in the latest mob attack to rock Milwaukee and set off another round of civic soul-searching.

Observation: I banish Milwaukee from the Midwest.

A majority of Canadians believe U.S. foreign policy was one of the root causes that led to the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks, and Quebecers are quicker to criticize the U.S. administration for its international actions than other Canadians, a recent poll suggests.

Observation: Sometimes I get so pissed that my mind won't work. I get this hot flash and then my brain gets hazy...fuzzy. There is so much fodder in that one sentence. Quebecers...French...cheese eating surrender monkeys. I recall Canada recently arrested a load of home-grown terrorists who were planning a domestic attack. I'm sure that's our fault, too. Think! Use your brains! Wake up and smell the muslim fanatics!!!!

JIDDAH, Saudi Arabia - Officials are considering an unprecedented proposal to ban women from performing the five Muslim prayers in the immediate vicinity of Islam’s most sacred shrine in Mecca.

Observation: I better not hear anything more about Catholics not letting women be priests.

Headline Observations

News from September 6, 2006

President George W. Bush acknowledged on Wednesday the CIA had interrogated dozens of terrorism suspects at secret overseas locations and said 14 of those held had been sent to the U.S. military prison at Guantanamo Bay.

My Observation:: Well I should sure hope so. Geez.

Islamic Republic News Agency reports that Ahmadinejad intends to travel to NYC, hopes to speak at UN on Sept. 19 at 7 PM; same day as Bush [whose speech is set for 11:30 AM] and day before Hugo Chavez... Both Ahmadinejad and Chavez will fly from Havana where they will see Castro... Earlier, Ahmadinejad said he was ready for debate with Bush at UN General Assembly...

My Observation: Isn't that just spit-on-your-neck-kick-you-in-the-crotch fantastic?

The sole survivor of a plane crash that killed 49 people near the Lexington airport last week told family members from his hospital bed, “Why did God do this to me?” but he hasn’t mentioned the crash, a close family friend said Wednesday.

My Observation: Jesus.

In case anyone needed proof, a new study supports the widely held perception: Celebrities are more in love with themselves than the average person.

My Observation:: Why is this news? We're at war. They can't find one "good news" story to report about the war, but they sure find space to print some dumbass USC "study" about mindless celebrities.

Fall enrollment at the University of Iowa went up slightly compared to last year, while there were small declines at Iowa State University and the University of Northern Iowa, the universities reported today.

My Observation: ISU aka Agricultural Extension College.

Did those conveniently timed cover stories proclaiming Jessica Simpson "head over heels" in love with John Mayer exaggerate the seriousness of their dating status just a wee bit? That's the word from the dizzy blond, who played down romantic rumblings about the floppyhaired crooner during Rosie O'Donnell's much-hyped co-host debut on "The View" Tuesday.

My Observation: And I was really looking forward to Simpsayer. Phooey.

Can't Sleep

I can't sleep. Part of the reason I can't sleep is because I desperately want to sleep. This happens to me every time I plan to arrive at work early. I just took a sleeping pill at 11:50 p.m., so now I'll eventually get to sleep but won't be able to wake up in the morning.

I decided to list all the crazy things churning through my head in the hopes that they will go away.

1. Jason Johansen. Why in the world did his name pop into my head? I went to school with Jason from 2nd grade through high school. I haven't thought about him in years. Last I knew he was living in Omaha and had a good job. He was always really good with numbers.

2. I need to fix my upstairs bath tub. It's not draining properly. And the toilet won't stop running...so I just shut off the water. Now I have to run downstairs everytime I have "to go." I'm lazy so I sometimes just hold it to avoid having to run downstairs. I'm sure this will cause some type of weird gyno thing and force me to see Dr. G. I like Dr. G very much, but I don't like to see her. Once a year is plenty for me. Geez - now that I talked about having to go I gotta' "go." If I don't think about it maybe it will go away.

3. When I think about work, I throw up a little bit in my mouth. I'm a little stressed out...what if I get fired? What if everyone thinks I suck? I have so much work to do. I need to get organized. But I hate working on the weekends. But the weekends are the only time to get organized.

4. I could really use a back massage. Even when I lay down to sleep my shoulders are scrunched up by my ears. But what if the masseuse has rough hands with callouses? That would be gross.

5. My cats are sound asleep. Salinger keeps making noises. I wonder if cats dream. What would Salinger dream about? Does he have nightmares of me picking him up like he's still a baby and giving him kisses on his head? From his perspective I must be a giant - like the Jolly Green Giant is to the little peapod kid in those old commercials. Boy, that would freak me out, too. Poor Sal.

6. I think it's going to rain during the baseball game tomorrow. What the heck am I going to wear? I need to pack my clothes and take them to work...change at work and leave by 5:05 so I can pick Andrew up by 5:45. Will it look bad that I'm leaving that early? That's why I need to get to work early. But my boss gave me the tickets... Must buy something and get one of the Cardinals to autograph for Mark.

7. I'm going to be 35. How in the hell did that happen?

8. I bought some Pepto Bismol colored pajama bottoms with scottie dogs all over them at Old Navy today. I threw away a pair I'd had since 2000. It was time. As I walked into the store and perused the fall selections I couldn't help but ask myself, "Am I too old to shop at Old Navy?" By the looks of things, yes. I also couldn't find anything at TJ MAXX. I think it may be time to limit my shopping to specialty stores and department stores. I am,m afterall, going to be 35.

9. I talked to a really nice guy at Kathy's party over the weekend. Hadn't seen him in a long time. Turns out he visited the hospital for work about a month ago. He'd never been there before - didn't even know it existed. It was a public service project for work. He's with the media. Small world.

10. I need to make an appointment with my orthodontist. It's been way too long since I was last there. I hope he's still alive. I wonder if I need to start paying again because it's been so long. I mean, I paid it all off years ago. Is there a statute of limitations on "payment in full?"

Okay, hopefully this has helped clear my head and I can sail off to Nevernever Land. It's 12:17 a.m. Just 6 hours and my alarm will go off to WTOP and tomorrow's headlines. Please God, give us a little happy news. Amen.

Gotta' go...literally.